Wednesday, August 20, 2014


This entry has absolutely nothing to do with cats.............

Today marks 24 months since my younger sister's (Tanya) death at the age of 38. Out of respect for her memory, I do not work today nor will I in any of the anniversaries that will come after this one and I will continue to dedicate a blog post to her on this day.

Life has carried on all around me in the days and months since she died and I continue to try to carry on with it. There is however a pain that continues to burn deep down in the depths of my soul, one that I feel each time a new day begins and ends. If nothing else, I can and do appreciate more now than I ever did before that sorrow and sadness can live quite strongly inside of us while we continue to try and keep walking forward - I know because it is alive and well inside of me.

I discovered a song not too long ago that a musician wrote for his Father who had passed away. I'll leave you with a part of it because it captures perfectly the journey I am on and my wish that when my times comes to return home to Heavenly Father; Tanya will be my guiding light that helps me home.

Well the road is wide,
And waters run on either side,
And my shadow went with fading light,
Stretching out towards the night.

'Cause the Sun is low,
And I yet have still so far to go,
My lonely heart is beating so,
Tired of the wonder.

But there's a sign ahead,
Though I think it's the same one again,
And I'm thinking 'bout my only friend,
And so I find my way home.

When I need to get home
You're my guiding light,
You're my guiding light.

When I need to get home,
You're my guiding light,
You're my guiding light.

Well the air is cold,
And yonder lies my sleeping soul,
By the branches broke like bones,
This weakened tree no longer holds.

But the night is still,
And I have not yet lost my will,
Oh and I will keep on moving 'till,
'Till I find my way home.

Tanya - 5 months before her passing


  1. there is never a timeline on grief....but we know she is with you

  2. LM-grief is not linear ... take comfort in knowing that Tanya is in a much better place; she is always with you ...

  3. As long as you keep her in your thoughts she's never really gone. She's with you everyday.